originally posted on cohost (rip)

you got me liquid courage for my birthday. the potion's gathering dust in the back of my shelf. i keep looking over to catch it glowing faintly. i'm choosing not to take it as a personal insult, knowing you mean well. and anyway, it doesn't really matter, because you clearly don't know me that well. you couldn't have known that i stayed up til 5am the night before working, working so deeply and patiently that i became above exhaustion, and i hit the deadline and it made me the most powerful man on earth. they're looking to interview me, the press.